On Dating An Older Man | HuffPost Life
Whether your love life takes you older or younger, high or Lo, our sex Sophia Loren in Grumpier Old Men and tell me that a year-old woman can't be told me I should only date older men, because even though I'm Are there any benefits for younger girls dating older men—other than getting access for girls to marry men who were a few years older - maybe by two to five years. . women that men over 45 get with are usually 18 to not much older than . I'm already falling for a man who's 20 years older than me. Don't get me wrong, there are advantages in a year-old guy. I'm 24 my man is 53 been together 3 years and still going strong he doesn't have tons of.
But now that I am, I am so torn. Do I turn away what seems to be my perfect match because of the age gap? Let me be clear, I'm not drawn to him because he "fathers me. It's really a case of two kindred spirits being separated by a lot of numerical years.
If I follow what feels right, am I setting myself up for future failure? Do you think this is a terrible idea? Usually, we don't question the things we know in our gut to in our best interests.
You are concerned that a 15 year age difference may be a "terrible idea" or "setting yourself up for future failure. In my opinion, there is a lot more than just 15 years that separates you from your year-old boyfriend. He's had a heck of a lot more life experience than you have. You are in your late twenties, a time in life when you are just beginning to become sure of who you are and what you want. You are creating your life while he is already in the prime of his.
If you were 40 and he was 55, I would not be as concerned about the age difference as both of you would have had ample time to experience life and mold your identity. By dating someone so much older, you are missing out on being with someone who is in the same phase of life that you are; someone with whom you can share the joys and pitfalls of discovery.
Plus, this is a new relationship and you need to take into account that some of the sparks you feel come from the novelty of it.
You mentioned that you are not trying to live out some father figure fantasy. Okay, but consider this: I speak from experience.
Older Man, Younger Woman: Can It Last?
In my twenties, I dated a man who was eleven years my senior and it was great until I realized I was living vicariously through him. I wanted to be where he was in his life - accomplished, more confident, and all the other things that come with additional years on the planet.
What I realized is that I was trying to skip over my own twenty-something experience by coat-tailing his life. Sure, we had the same kind of connection you speak about and I really did feel like we were kindred sprits in a lot of ways; however, the unavoidable truth was that we were at very different points of our lives. Dating an older man can be an ego boost since being wanted by someone older makes you feel more mature.
I share this with you because I encourage you to ask yourself if some of his appeal lies in the simple fact that he is older. Because of this, I believe it is a terrible idea for young girls to fall in love with older men. Why It's a Bad Idea Finally, let's get into some of the problems that a couple may face when the guy is much older. To get an idea of the possible challenges, you only have to read the experiences of women who have married old men.
These tragic stories are all over the internet.
So, I will be very blunt in the list below. If you are having an affair with such a man, physical compatibility could be an issue.
You will be in the prime of your life, and he'll be rapidly approaching the end of his. While you are spending hours in the hospital because he has fallen ill, your friends will be sharing stories about their baby showers and their children's sports activities.
If he is married, then you will be his second choice. His wife and his children will always be his top priority. Which is why he is still married and you are his mistress. If he can cheat on his wife with you, he would cheat on you with an even younger girl. If you wish to start a family, there are emotional and physical barriers.
An older man's sperm usually cannot produce healthy babies. Physically he may not be able to do all the activities with your child that are expected of a father. Emotionally, he may not be ready to create competition for his kids from his previous first marriage. Cary Grant paired with much younger Audrey Hepburn in Charade 2 Source How to Make the Relationship Work The benefits of dating an older man are very few, and most fathers would have a hard time if their daughters began to date one.
To be fair, some couples have successfully lived together despite the age difference. Here are some tips to make your marriage work: This is the number one game-changer in all relationships. Despite all your differences, it is the willingness to talk that keeps the flame burning bright. Talk to him, listen to him, share ideas. Discuss things you like and dislike. Talk about your future plans.
That's one good thing about marrying an older man—he listens better than a younger one. Read a lot so that you can discuss politics, entertainment, and sports. That brings me to my next point.
What You Must Know Before Dating an Older Man | PairedLife
You must watch sports with him, if that's what he likes—and find it genuinely interesting. I know it's a stereotype that men like sports. Develop an interest in whatever it is that he likes. Also, get him to do the same for what you love to do. Doing things together improves communication, which was my previous point. However, my next point is going to contradict this one. Give each other space: Yes, you should find things to do together. But also spend time apart so that each of you can do the things the other doesn't like on your own.
There's no point trying to force your man to go shopping with you, for example.
Let him catch up with a buddy over a beer while you go and spend his money. You will need to find the right balance between doing things together and being independent. If given a choice, would you like to have an affair with an older man?